Chapter 6
Never too Late for Romance
My favorite story about romance is a humorous one that happened at a restaurant in Taipei.
The occasion was a “Teachers’ Thank You Dinner” with a large group of graduating seniors at my university.
After the meal, a student mistress of ceremonies invited each professor to say a few words.
A very zealous student, she was affixing adjectives before our names as she invited us to come to the microphone.
The pleasant Professor Chen,” she would say, or “ The impressive Professor Lin,” and so on.When my turn came, she used words for me that almost knocked me off my chair in surprise.And now please welcome the pure and romantic Professor Baucer.”Her words made me feel uneasy, and as I stood and looked out at 130 faces, my throat felt like dry sandpaper.
Thank you for your introduction, but I must say, that is, I-“ I groped for something to say. Then an idea came to me.
I may be a little romantic sometimes, but I’m sorry to have to tell you that I am not pure.”
This remark sent laughter rolling over the crowd, and gave me a chance to relax for a few seconds.
I then spoke of the glories of teaching these students, and of how much I would miss them. When I was young, my mother had a saying I still treasure. She’d say ,” It’s better late than never.”
Back in my home country St. Valentine’s Day is an important holiday.I think many of us may have missed doing anything special on that day. That doesn’t really matter, because the topic associated with St. Valentine is romance, and romance is not confined to a single day of the year. If you happened to have missed St. Valentine’s Day this year, you still have a chance.
As my mother used to say, “ It’s better late than never.!”
There is a fine English newspaper called the “ International Herald Tribune.”I may stop reading it because that paper really let me down this year on St. Valentine’s day!
Can you believe that on February 14th, the Tribune did not publish a single reference to romance, or even bother to mention the name of St. Valentine?The paper did run an article that day, however, by a writer named Nicholas D. Kristof.
He focused on marriage in Japan, but his words struck me because he talked of a marriage may lack romance.
The author wrote about a Japanese woman in her 70s who was married for more than forty years.
Ah, I thought to myself, since today is St. Valentine’s Day , and she’s been married all those years, she’ll be able to tell me a lot about romance. But the lady in the article said in all her years of marriage, her husband had never told her he liked her, never complimented her cooking, never said the words “ thank you” to her, never held her hand, never given her a present, never called her by name, never showed her affection in any way.
The most eye-catching detail in this anecdote is probably the use of the word “ never,” which occurs seven times, always in relation to the lack of acts of tenderness or romance.
Have you ever asked yourself what causes more hurt in people’s lives-words that are spoken, or words that are held back and buried in silence?
I believe we may hurt others more by the words we do not say than by the words we do say.
There is a time and a place to be silent of course, but there are also moments when silence kills.
I know I am only a Catholic priest (a ‘shen-fu”) , and without a wife or “ romantic other,” people may feel I know nothing about love. But I know people, and I know the tears and pain that silence can cause in relationships.
The story of that 70-year-old woman in Japan should stir reflection.
Does it matter that the woman is Japanese?
I think nationality in itself has little to do with communication of care or love for another person.
It might be true that some cultures express feelings in words or physical gestures more readily than others, as for example by offering hugs or smiles in public, but that doesn’t mean a culture has no way to show emotion or tenderness.
Many Chinese students have told me their parents rarely or never say to them, “ I love you,” but they show their love in different ways.
A mother might make special food for a student to take to school to eat, for example.
Or she may say,” Be sure to use an extra blanket at night so you don’t catch a cold,” or “ Study hard, but be sure to relax, too.”
In these cases the content of the words actually means tenderness and concern.
Psychologists often find that people may know on the level of ideas that someone loves them, but not feel that love deep inside their emotions.
For reasons usually linked to childhood, a person may grow up not believing anyone really cares about their happiness or sadness.
That is why wise counselors often urge parents to express their tenderness for their children in words.
Is it true that human beings occasionally need to hear or see a word from the people who matter the most to them in life?
I use the word “see” because words need not always be spoken.
We all “say” our words in different ways.
The problem is if we are not careful, we may let silence do too much of the talking for us, and unknowingly hurt some very beautiful people in our lives.
They may not know our feelings for them because we’ve never told them directly.
Communication with words may not be easy.
It requires an attitude of mind and a sensitivity for the feelings of the other person.
Communication also demands that we must look bravely at ourselves, for to put words to what dwells inside us is first to see and know what lives deep within us.
Rare is the person courageous enough to study and embrace his or her own heart.
Yet we need such courage to let someone know how much we love them.
My Mom used to say, “It’s better late than never.”
Perhaps it isn’t yet too late to talk with someone we care about.
It’s never too late for just a bit of romance.
試做與延伸讀NyTimes ( )
Chapter 6
Never too Late for Romance
My favorite story /about romance is a humorous one //that happened /at a restaurant /in Taipei.
The occasion was a “Teachers’ Thank You Dinner” /with a large group /of graduating seniors /at my university.
After the meal, a student mistress /of ceremonies invited each professor /to say a few words.
飯後會場女主持人邀請每位教授講幾句話
A very zealous student, /she was affixing adjectives/ before our names /as she invited us /to come /to the microphone.
The pleasant Professor Chen,” she would say, /or “ The impressive Professor Lin,” /and so on.
When my turn came, /she used words /for me (that almost knocked me off my chair /in surprise).
And now please welcome (“ the pure) and (romantic Professor Baucer.)”
[ Her words made me feel uneasy], /and [as I (stood) and (looked out /at 130 faces),/ my throat felt /like dry sandpaper].
[Thank you /for your introduction], but [I must say, /that is, I-“ I groped /for something /to say”]. Then an idea came to me].
{I may be a little romantic sometimes}, but {I’m sorry /to have /to tell you [that I am not pure]}.
This remark (sent laughter rolling /over the crowd), and (gave me a chance /to relax /for a few seconds).
I then spoke of the glories [of teaching these students], and [of how much (I would miss them)].
When I was young, my mother had a saying [I still treasure]. She’d say ,“ It’s better late than never.”
Back in my home country St. Valentine’s Day is an important holiday.
I think [many of us /may have missed doing anything special /on that day].
[That doesn’t really matter, //because the topic associated /with St. Valentine is romance], and [romance is not confined /to a single day /of the year].
If you happened /to have missed St. Valentine’s Day this year, you still have a chance.
As my mother used to say, “ It’s better late than never.!”
There is a fine English newspaper //called the “ International Herald Tribune.”(過去分詞片語修是前面的newspaper )
I may stop reading it //because that paper really let me down this year /on St. Valentine’s day!
Can you believe [that on February 14th, //the Tribune did not [publish a single reference /to romance], or [even bother /to mention the name /of St. Valentine]?
The paper did run an article that day, /however, //by a writer named Nicholas D. Kristof.
[He focused on marriage /in Japan],but [ his words struck me //because he talked of a marriage may lack romance].
The author wrote /about a Japanese woman /in her 70s (who was married /for more than forty years).
Ah, I thought to myself, [since today is St. Valentine’s Day] , and [she’s been married all those years, //she’ll be able /to tell me a lot /about romance].
But the lady /in the article said /in all her years /of marriage, [/her husband had never told her [he liked her], never complimented her cooking, never said the words “ thank you” /to her, never held her hand, never given her a present, never called her by name, never showed her affection /in any way.]
The most eye-catching detail /in this anecdote/ is probably the use /of the word “ never,” //which occurs seven times,// always /in relation /to the lack of acts /of (tenderness) or (romance).
Have you ever asked yourself [what causes more hurt /in people’s lives-words (that are (spoken), or (words) [that are held back and buried /in silence]?
I believe [we may hurt others more /by the words (we do not say than /by the words (we do say)].
[There is a time and a place /to be silent of course], but [there are also moments when silence kills].
I know [I am only a Catholic priest (a ‘shen-fu”)] , and (without a wife) or “ (romantic other),” /people may feel [I know nothing about love].
But {I know people}, and {I know (the tears) and (pain) [that silence can cause /in relationships]}.
The story /of that 70-year-old woman /in Japan should stir reflection.
Does it matter //that the woman is Japanese?
I think nationality /in itself has little /to do /with communication /of (care) or (love /for another person).
It might be true {[that some cultures express feelings /in (words) or (physical gestures /more readily than others), //as for example /by offering (hugs) or (smiles /in public)}, but {that doesn’t mean [a culture has no way /to show (emotion) or (tenderness)]}.
{ Many Chinese students have told me //[their parents (rarely) or (never say /to them), “ I love you”,]} but {they show their love /in different ways}.
A mother might make special food /for a student /to take to school /to eat, for example.
Or she may say,{” Be sure /to use an extra blanket /at night// so you don’t catch a cold,” } or {“ Study hard, but be sure /to relax, too.”}
In these cases// the content of the words actually means (tenderness) and (concern).
Psychologists often find {that people may [know /on the level /of ideas (that someone loves them)}, but [not feel //that love deep inside their emotions]}.
For reasons usually linked /to childhood, a person may grow up not believing anyone really cares /about their (happiness) or (sadness).
That is [why wise counselors often urge parents /to express their tenderness /for their children /in words].
Is it true [that human beings occasionally need /to (hear) or (see a word) /from the people (who matter the most /to them /in life)?
I use the word “see” //because words need not always be spoken.
We all “say” our words /in different ways.
The problem is //{if we are not careful, we [may let silence do /too much /of the talking /for us], and [unknowingly hurt some very beautiful people /in our lives]}.
They may not know our feelings /for them //because we’ve never told them directly.
Communication /with words /may not be easy.
It requires an attitude /of mind and a sensitivity /for the feelings /of the other person.
Communication also demands [that we must look bravely /at ourselves, //for /to put words /to (what dwells inside us is first) /to (see) and (know) //what lives deep within us].
***Communication also demands {that we must (look ....)and (know......)}(需要再推敲...)
Rare is the person courageous enough /to (study) and (embrace (his) or (her own heart)).
Yet we need such courage /to let [someone know how much (we love them)].
My Mom used to say, “It’s better late than never.”
Perhaps it isn’t yet too late /to talk /with someone (we care about).
It’s never too late /for just a bit of romance.
我媽習慣說，遲到/晚到 總比沒到好
跟我們關心的人說點浪漫的話語是不會太慢了
延伸閱讀NyTime,
當能力達到時，我覺得就可以開始進行
沒道理要等到整個課程結束後再來，我覺得這要自我要求和勇氣，也期望陳博士在下學期在出第一次作業時，請納入我的建議進去，總得要提升，事實上，在上網率普遍下，就應當嘗試一下。
因為方法相同
延伸閱讀
New North Korean Leader Meets South Koreans and Assumes Leadership of Party
第一段
SEOUL, South Korea — Kim Jong-un, the new leader of North Korea, met Monday with a private delegation of prominent South Koreans, his first face-to-face encounter with any visitors from the estranged South since assuming the top spot a week ago when his father’s death was announced.
By CHOE SANG-HUN
Published: December 26, 2011
SEOUL, South Korea —
1> Kim Jong-un,
2> the new leader of North Korea,
3 > met Monday with a private delegation of prominent South Koreans,
4> his first face-to-face encounter /with any visitors /from the estranged South
5> since assuming the top spot a week ago
6> when his father’s death was announced.
主結構第一段
1> Kim Jong-un, (金正恩)
3 > met….............,
紐約時報對亞洲人士的稱呼是用拼音法(音譯)如: Kim Jong-un
#2修飾(補充說明)#1
#4修飾(補充說明)#1、#3
#5、#6修飾(補充說明為什麼是由他接班的時間點補述)
Kim Jong-un(A),.......met with (B)
第二段
The meeting, scrutinized for any hint of Mr. Kim’s intentions toward South Korea, came as the official North Korean news media announced he had been appointed to the top post of the ruling party, another step in what appeared to be a choreographed sequence of events meant to show that he was assuming all the key positions held by his father, Kim Jong-il, the longtime ruler of the isolated, nuclear-armed North.
1>The meeting,
2>scrutinized /for any hint /of Mr. Kim’s intentions toward South Korea,
3> came //as the official North Korean news media announced
he had been appointed /to the top post /of the ruling party,
4>another step /in what appeared /to be a choreographed sequence /of events meant
/to show /that he was assuming all the key positions held by his father,
5>Kim Jong-il, the longtime ruler /of the isolated,
6>nuclear-armed North.
第三段
South Korea had said it would send no official mourners to Kim Jong-il’s funeral, which angered North Korea as a sign of disrespect.
But Kim Jong-un’s meeting with the private delegation of mourners,
which included the former first lady of South Korea and a top businesswoman, appeared to be cordial.
![LPwEXKl5hCqTk71PgFxLNg[1]](https://pic.pimg.tw/assf0102/1380006120-2603511230.jpg "LPwEXKl5hCqTk71PgFxLNg[1]")
![1SSQOBoeVK4GFTYimr0jYA[1].jpg](https://pic.pimg.tw/assf0102/1380005745-1393035160.jpg "1SSQOBoeVK4GFTYimr0jYA[1].jpg")
![lNe7UsKYU0sHngCJSTFgXA[1].jpg](https://pic.pimg.tw/assf0102/1380002502-1504305885_n.jpg "lNe7UsKYU0sHngCJSTFgXA[1].jpg")
